This article is adapted and was originally published by Matthew Watson with The Well Community Church in San Antonio, TX, and is used under a CC BY-SA 4.0 license.
The things we cultivate now will be harvested later. For many of us, family worship is one of those quaint, idealistic visions of families eating around a dinner table, reading the Bible, and doing catechisms with our kids. While it is easy to blame Netflix and Disney+ for distracting us from connecting as families, it is also unlikely we experienced family worship ourselves, and we don’t know what it is, why it is important, or how to do it.
We all worship, but we don’t always worship God. We worship things with our wallets, our wristwatches, and our energy. And since all of life is lived before God, all of life is to be worshipful of God. Article 22.6 of the 1689 Baptist Confession of Faith says, “… but God is to be worshiped everywhere in spirit and in truth; as in private families daily, and in secret each one by himself; so more solemnly in the public assemblies, which are not carelessly nor wilfully to be neglected or forsaken, when God by his word or providence calls thereunto.”
Therefore there is a time for corporate worship, as well as worship through music, worship through prayer, and worship through work. There is also a time for worshiping as a family. In this article, we will discuss the what and why of family worship, and in the next, we will discuss the how.
What is Family Worship?
Family worship is a regular rhythm of worshiping God as a family. It can be as organic or formal as the family needs, but it is often a daily occurrence where family members spend time in the Word, praying, and sometimes singing a hymn or working through a catechism. While we will talk about more specifics later, know that family worship first starts with its condensed form of private devotions, and then expands to include the family since we are inherently made to be in community (Gen 2:18). Therefore, quiet times, Bible studies, community group, and discipleship groups are all training for family worship.
Deuteronomy 6:4-7 says, “Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.” This is a God-given command to every family to make disciples of their children, and no less true for foster families with the children entrusted to them.
One recommendation for a “quick guide.”
Family worship is not just for children, but for the parents too, and not just for parents, but for married couples too. Ephesians 5:25-26 says, “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.” Therefore, it is the responsibility of the husband to wash his bride with the Word of God, as well as for him to teach the Word to his children.
This will look different for single moms, married couples, and families, but there are some best practices in general. Seminary professor and author Donald Whitney suggests reading the Bible, praying, and singing as the main meat and potatoes of family worship, and if time permits then consider catechisms, Scripture memorization, and reading other books together (Whitney 2016, 44).
Why Should You Do Family Worship?
First, simply, you get to worship God as a family. There is no greater responsibility for an adult than to make disciples, especially of his or her children. Getting to worship the Creator God in all of his holiness and goodness should be a treat beyond compare. When we do this we create little churches in our homes, with every man the pastor of his home. Martin Luther says, “Abraham [who] had in his tent a house of God and a church, just as today any godly and pious head of household instructs his children … in godliness. Therefore such a house is actually a school and church, and the head of the household is a bishop and priest in his house” (Whitney 2016, 30).
“If you do not disciple yourself, your spouse, or your kids, then something else will.”
Second, family worship teaches men to be husbands and fathers leading their families as the head of household just as Christ is the head of his bride. Women learn to be wives and mothers, helping and managing the family. Children learn to be productive members of their families, not just consumers, and thus they learn to be true sons and daughters.
Therefore, as a family gathers around the Word of God, praying to God, and singing praises to God, the whole family is made into disciples. Not just the kids, but the mom and dad, the grandparent, the widow, and the single too. For single men and women, and empty-nesters, it is their responsibility to be in community with the Lord regularly. If you are a married couple, it is your responsibility to mirror the relationship of Christ and his bride. If you have kids (including single parents, married parents, foster parents, biological parents, and adoptive parents), your primary responsibility is to raise your kids to be disciples of Jesus. And if you do not disciple yourself, your spouse, or your kids, then something else will.
Third, It glorifies God to the watching world. The Puritan commentator Matthew Henry is credited with saying, “As goes family worship, so goes the home; as goes the home, so goes the church; as goes the church, so goes the nation; as goes the nation, so goes the world.” Elsewhere he said, “A church in the house will contribute very much to the prosperity of the church of God in the nation . . . If there were a church in every house, there would be such a church in our land as would make it a praise throughout the whole earth. We cannot better serve our country than by keeping up religion in our families” (Henry 1833, 1:595).
Imagine what it would look like for all of our families, foster and otherwise, to make disciples first in the family and then to the world around them as a little church outpost. As Henry said, “Here the reformation must begin” (Whitney 2016, 35).
For Further Reading
Henry, Matthew. 1833. “A Church in the House: A Sermon Concerning Family Religion,” in The Miscellaneous Works of the Rev. Matthew Henry, 2 vols. London: Joseph Ogle Robinson.
Whitney, Donald S. 2016. Family Worship. Wheaton, Illinois: Crossway.
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